Who Are You Talking To? Myself!

Photo Baran Lotfollahi - Unsplash

As a child, I would be in another room playing with paper dolls or “teaching” toys and my grandmother would ask who I was talking to. Sometimes I’d respond, “to myself.” She used to say it’s okay to talk to yourself as long as you don’t answer. I used to believe her. But over the years I have come to totally disagree. I talk to and answer myself with affirmations.

Affirmations have been a part of my spiritual practice for at least thirty years. There are two particular scriptures that provoked me to become more cognizant of the ways in which I talked to myself and about myself. James 1:8 tells us that a doubleminded man(one who has two desires that don’t agree with each other, is indecisive and vacillating) is unstable. The other is Proverbs 18:20–21 Wise words (words that are prudent, well thought out, sound, and enlightened) satisfy like a good meal; the right words bring satisfaction. The tongue can bring life (vivacity, energy, strength, spirit) or death( demise, ruin, collapse). Affirmations help us to choose to speak wisely and decisively about ourselves.

Affirmations are important to me because I have found that they have viable potential to….

• Help one gain or recover their self-worth. So many people have dealt with or are coping with rejection. They may look good on the outside but are messed up on the inside. They’ve been rejected by parents, siblings, mates, families, neighborhoods, educational institutions, religious institutions, fraternities/sororities, and other social clubs, financial institutions, and employers just to name a few sources. Working as an educator who served children with special needs, I was aware of children who had never been invited to a birthday party. Rejection. Rejection from others can lead to self-rejection. Personal affirmations can help build self-acceptance and foster self-love.

“The greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity or power, but self-rejection.” ~ Henri Nouwen

• Help to harness your thoughts. Unbridled negative thoughts can wreak havoc on your mental health. Everybody knows that. Enough said.

• Build your resilience. Affirmations have helped me to bounce back quicker from setbacks and emotional funks don’t last as long as they once did.

• Help you reside in hope. You have to at least have some hope when you might not yet have faith. We cannot predict or control the future but we can live fully present in hope.

• Help to calm breathing and induce a more relaxed state by taking time to breathe, pause, and slow down your rate of speech. Affirmations are not statements that you rush through. You chew on them and allow them to digest; take up residence in your soul and heart.

Here are some of my affirmations.

1. I direct my emotions and energy into activities that will not harm me. I use worry energy to connect with God.

2. I will adjust the environment to fit my needs. I will not adjust my needs to fit the environment.

3. I see myself through eyes of kindness and acceptance.

4. I release myself from every false purpose and all false guilt.

5. I love and respect myself and enjoy being myself.

6. I am an answer.

7. I can pivot easily when necessary.

8. I view my life as an adventure with God so I will enjoy his company.

9. I live each day excited to pursue my passion.

10. I do not give energy to dead thoughts of past things I can do nothing about.

My affirmations are my credo. I make time for them every day. I carry them in my phone and pull them out when I am waiting at appointments or have time before meetings start. You don’t have to have a lot of them as the number doesn’t matter. Choose statements that speak to you.

Always encouraging reflection, WandaP

The content of his article is not intended nor implied to be pastoral, mental health/medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.